Stevie

As per my aunt's request, I will now put together a short tribute to my brother Steven. He is two years, four days and 22ish hours younger than me, thinks he's the smartest person in the world (maybe excepting Stephen Hawking) and is getting home from serving a 2 year mission for our church in the desolate wilderness they call California.

Top (edited because I kept going) ELEVEN Reasons Steven is a Kool Kat:

11. He pulled/stretched his socks all the way up to his knees from the age of 2 and stopped around age 10. Yes, especially when he was wearing shorts. Yes, they were the exact same height on both legs.

10. Had a zero tolerance for bubbles in his milk until he was 5. Maybe 6. You can only imagine what my mother (and babysitting aunts) went through with this one.

9. Around the age of 2, every single time he saw a truck he would shout, over and over, "F%^&! A F^*&#!" much to the horror of those around him. The real kicker is that the more you'd try to shut him up, the louder he'd say it.

8. Refused to eat rice until he was 17.

7. Used handfuls of sculpting gel to comb his hair straight back and mostly flat against his head until 8th grade.

6. In 8th grade he discovered that his hair had a natural "curl" and proceeded to grow it out until it looked like a fuzzy cottonball on top of his head. My friend Brent called it a "white man's 'fro."

5. During high school, while he was supposed to be studying at night, he stacked his coins in perfectly straight stacks. (I would help him out and make them crooked every chance I got.)
4. Allowed me to not only spray him in the face with cleaner, but to also spit gum into his hair. I think I was three. You'd think that he would have stuck up for himself.

3. Tells other people that they're dumb and then insults them in such a way that they don't usually realize that he's insulting them.

2. Was obsessed with Beast Wars - the animal version of Transformers. Really. Obsessed.

1. He would always turn his fire-fighter hat on backwards and say it was a cowboy hat. Then he would hop on his "hoss" (bouncing plastic horse)
and then shout "whooooaaaa, WHOoooaaAAA WHOOOAAA" And pretend he was about to fall off his horse.

Can't wait until you get home Steven! It will be fun to text you while you are in church and make you feel bad for bringing your phone when it goes off in the middle of dead silence. Love you!